Uncomfortable

You are standing in the office talking with a friend as another coworker approaches. Your friend introduces the both of you, sharing with him that you are a Christian. You begin to get a little nervous. But it isn't because you are ashamed of Christ. No, you love Christ and live your life for his name. So what’s the problem? It’s the word Christian. So your mind recalls the times when you have seen someone abuse the name. Maybe it was someone distant like a televangelist, preaching a message of materialism. Or maybe a close friend or someone you trusted, perhaps a church leader or a pastor who didn't do the best service to the church or to you. Whoever that person may be, they didn't quite portray Christ the way you know him. So thinking about the name, you get a little worried. You wonder, “What experiences has this person had with Christians? And what does he assume when someone uses the word ‘Christian?’” Now that you think about it, you might have already offended him by wearing the name.

I remember the time something similar happened to me. It was my first job in the real world, working morning shifts at a warehouse. Not only was I the newest guy, I was also the youngest. In fact, I had just turned 18. As if that didn’t put me on the outside enough, I was soon known as the Christian. So was I afraid of being the object of laughter and criticism? Not exactly. I was more concerned with the stereotypes that come with the name Christian. Staunch. Judgmental. Self-righteous. Just to name a few. Uncomfortable for them, but not for you.

And guess what? That is exactly what I got from my coworkers, at least at first. I spent my one year at the warehouse dismantling the stereotypes and trying not to stand out too much. But I still stood out. I was invited to strip clubs and bars every weekend, and sometimes the occasional road trip to Vegas or Frisco. Each time I turned the offers down, each time I stood out. My newfound friends recalled countless stories of Christians who showed up in a suit and tie at church every Sunday morning, yet were in the strip clubs by Sunday night. They didn’t understand why I was different.

All I wanted them to know was I wasn’t there to judge or condemn them, but neither was I there to cop a change on my savior. I was uncomfortable for a while, because I spent the majority of my time breaking the stereotypes and showing them a new type of Christianity. Once that began to happen (and it took some time), I started to go to barbeques, parties, and befriended several coworkers. Don’t get me wrong everything wasn’t all rosy. There were still times I was dogged, because I had been invited to things I wouldn’t attend on account of my beliefs.

Though I would be lying if I said some of the offers weren’t tempting. One of my coworkers even offered to have one of his female friends give me a private strip show for my 19th birthday. The reason? He couldn’t understand how someone my age would want to be a virgin, when the Christians he had known didn’t seem to care much. I still remember him stopping me on my forklift and asking, “I don’t understand. Do you want to be a virgin forever? Don’t you want to have sex?”

Uncomfortable. We all feel it at different points in our lives, though some more than others. Me, I’m a naturally uncomfortable Christian. It’s not Christ I’m uncomfortable with or ashamed of, nothing could be farther from the truth. I am uncomfortable with the name Christian and what comes with it. I am uncomfortable with all the stereotypes and misuses; all the misconceptions and abuses. In one word, all the baggage.

And now I am writing in this blog, because no matter the baggage that comes with the name, I can’t seem to leave it behind. For me it is a name that has enormous potential. It could mean a person who follows Jesus and tries to imitate his life. Or a believer who announces the coming of a new kingdom and a new reality, where hate and war are destroyed and love and peace reign. So for now, I’ll risk uncomfortable. Though I still wonder, “If Jesus were a Christian, what type of Christian would he be?”

So to start off this blog, I want to ask you a question. What thoughts come to mind when you hear the words religion, obedience, Christianity, or church? Or better yet, what religious words make you uncomfortable?